Tuesday, July 24, 2007

My last day of work once again

Hellew all =). My last day of work for the second time was on the 20th July 2007 and it was a happy day for me. The day started off when I was about to go down to the filling room. In the hallway outside my office, I met my boss, she saw me from the lift and she said hi to me... I decided to carry on walking to the lift, she then blocked my path, wherever I turned, she kept blocking me then she said, “I need to talk to you”. I then went in, and this is how the conversation went.

BIG BOSS : Today is your last day right?

ME : *all smiles* Yes

BIG BOSS : Are you really leaving today?

ME : Yes

BIG BOSS : Did you really quit school?

ME : Yes

BIG BOSS : You’re looking for a permanent position right?

ME : Yes

BIG BOSS : What is it that you want out of this bank?

ME : *leans forward* Career progression

BIG BOSS : I can’t promise you that in this department as you know it is very hard for me to make some of them permanent. Like last year, Zai was offered permanent and just recently, Rosie.

ME : OK… *Thinking in head: What is she trying to get at?*

BIG BOSS : I can’t assure you that I can give you a permanent job by the end of this year.

ME : Actually, I sat for a test in HSBC and I even know my test results. I’m just waiting a call for an interview.

BIG BOSS : Oh… but its not like they will call you so soon, so in the mean time, I want to buy your services and if you get that call, and you want to leave the next day I’ll let you go, at least you can earn something while waiting.

ME : I’m still leaving

BIG BOSS : * looks at me pitifully* I really need you and I rely on you.

ME : I’ll think about it and I’ll give you an answer by the end of the day

BIG BOSS : Thank you, think about it and make sure you see me at the end of the day ok.

ME : Ok, I’ll think about it.

There was more to that conversation; she made it sound as if though I will not get that job at HSBC. I am very determined to get that job and I will, its just the matter of time, both the big boss and the officer is on leave till the end of the month, so I’ll probably get a call by early august and I do not think that it is such a long wait and besides, I get to relax a bit and be a DVD junkie, for the next week or so.

After that, I asked my sister from HSBC to give me a call; I really needed to consult someone. There were plenty of questions running through my head; should I just stay till the end of the month? Should I just go? If I stay, doesn’t that mean that she wins? But one thing was for sure, I am not going to stay. After I consulted my sister, I knew what the answer would be and nothing will move me of my decision.

I lingered around the office, laughing and making jokes with Rosie and Talib. I do not have pictures this time round because I just didn’t want to take any; it would bring back all the memories and would make it harder. I had lunch with Rosie, we talked a lot. And after lunch I had a bit of excitement… hehehe… nothing big but it was something ;). When Rosie and I got back to the office, it was about 2 p.m. and as I was about to go down, the cute, tall, Chinese looking and bottle framed glasses wearing DHL guy was in the hall way, I automatically went back in and held the door for him. He then smiled, I stood at Talib’s desk, and I thank Talib for not being there at the time… heheheh… The DHL guy then puts his clipboard on the desk, and he said “Tulis nama kita ah”, I grabbed Talib’s pen and wrote my name on the paper “KeL”. At that point, he was actually on one of his knees… heheheh… romantic right?!? But it is not what it seem to be, his bag was on the floor, he takes a peek of my name and says, “Oh, KeL” he then unzips his bag and puts the package on the desk, and zips his bag up, he then stands up and said “Ma Seh (short form for Terima Kasih) and I just smiled at him. I could have actually gone out and go on the lift with him because I was headed to the first floor, who knows more action right? But no… I decided to stay on and make Rosie jealous. That whole time, Rosie kept peering at me from her desk and when he left, she went “eeehhh… Kambang eh, I don’t want to talk to you” hahhahahah we then made jokes about the guy, if one of us were to have sized him up in the lift…hahaha… he is so cute! I should have just said to him, you’re cute but I didn’t, I let that fish go I guess but it was good =). The day dragged on and it was almost time for me to face my big boss for the last and final time.

I then filled out my claim sheet and put it on my other officer’s desk which is beside my big boss. I then sat on of her chairs across her. She was actually calculating something at that time and so I just waited. By the time she was done she smiled at me and this is how everything went.

BIG BOSS : And so?

ME : I would like to know, why are you only offering me now?

BIG BOSS : Well, at that time, you seemed unsure. But now, you quit school and you still quit your job, then you must be waiting for something. So that is why I offered you, I really need you for the retrieval project, even if it’s just for a month.

ME : Oh… Ok

BIG BOSS : So are you still leaving?

ME : Yes


ME : Honestly, this is how I felt. That day when I came to you and after we talked, I felt heartbroken and hopeless after what you have told me. Mr. H, offered to talk to you but I said no because I should just carry on resigning.

BIG BOSS : Oh I see, actually when people like me talk to our workers, we hope that they are on the same wavelength as us but it seems that you got the wrong idea. You are not hopeless…

ME : Ok… *Thinks in head: I didn’t say I was hopeless, I said I felt hopeless. Was she not listening to me?*

BIG BOSS : You are a good worker. You seem to finish things ahead of the time that we set. And you are very accurate and you are responsible when given a task. It’s a complement you know…

ME : Ah, ok…

BIG BOSS : So that is why I’m still holding on to resignation and I have not given it to HR.

ME : I actually gave my resignation to HR. And the reason why I gave you one months’ notice was so that you would find someone new which I can personally train myself. I also did not want to find you someone new because I’m afraid that the person cannot give you what I can.

BIG BOSS : Oh no, we won’t blame you if that person you recommended messes up everything. If a person is given a responsibility, they should know better and be responsible.

ME : Oh ok

~ Big Boss actually yaps on about a person in the bank who recommended her their not so great part timer and that within 3 months he would be jobless and stuff ~

BIG BOSS : So are you going to stay?

ME : *all smiles* Nope, I will still be leaving.

BIG BOSS : *stares at me speechless and pitifully*

ME : *gives my biggest smile ever*

~ There was a pause during that time, an uncomfortable one too ~

BIG BOSS : Ok lah, it’s your decision and I can’t make you change your mind. So now, we would have a lot of backlog to clear up.

ME : *laughing* Well, I have nothing to worry about, it’s not my problem.

BIG BOSS : *holds out her hand* thank you KeL for your service, I want to wish you good luck with HSBC.

ME : *shakes Big Boss hand* Thank you very much.

And so that was how things went and after that I laughed and joked around with my office mates for a bit before my sister miss called me. My former officer, Lillian, called me up to ask what happened and I told her the whole story. So before I left, I said all my good byes, gave the ladies the necessary hug and kisses and a last hand shake to the men and I salam-ed Jamain, he’s a really nice guy and I was off, leaving the bank and never to return. I felt satisfied for what I said to my big boss, I hope she has learned her lesson to NEVER turn down a good worker or hurt them when she sees one.

And so that is the ending of one of the chapters in my life, a new one will be starting soon. I’m actually going to plan a barbeque picnic at Tutong beach for me and my young ex-colleagues… wait more like close friends, on either the 11th or 12th of August. So we can catch up on things and have a bit of fun… I’m really going to miss them all; all the time I spent getting to know each and one of them… ~sigh~ I’m getting all mushy and stuff here. I’ll just end this here. =) it’s a new beginning for me =). Bubyez… muahz <33

Thursday, July 19, 2007

happy and content =)

Hi all!!! =).Well, I’ve got good news… First of all, my sis found out how I did for my tests at HSBC… I was pretty surprised myself when she told me… I got 79%ile for the English test and for my Math test, I scored a 76%ile!!! I was pretty surprised about the Math test result… I really want this job so badly!!! My sis says I have to wait for the guy to call me up… I’ll then have to go through the interview, which I cannot screw up! ~oh my! I’m getting nervous even before I got the call ;) As for my last day at the bank, it will be tomorrow and I’m pretty happy about it. All that I have gone through, all the hard work, stress, pressure and load of crap I went through is finally over!!! Yay!!! :D For sure, I’ll the one celebrating and being all happy and jolly about it! My work at this bank is done and its time to move on… I’m moving on to better things in life =) and also I think I’m destined to work in a bank… For some reason, I really like what I’m doing and if I get that job at HSBC, which I must get, I hope things will be better there and I hope I’ll not just like my job but love it as well =) I sound like a psycho lah!!! But this is how happy I am at the moment =D

Oh before I go off… I just give a BIG THANK YOU to CT…. thanks for the support you have given me and the pep talk that you gave me yesterday! You’re one of the friends I treasure the most =) thanks CT!!!! And also, DIRAH… thank you for giving me encouragement and asking me to apply at other places =) you don’t have to worry about me… I’m doing really good at the moment, actually I’ve never been more happier =) I have good things ahead of me =) Thanks Dirah for the encouragement… you’re a good friend <33

Aight that is all for now… I’ll update soon =) bubyez… muahz <33

Tuesday, July 17, 2007

loong weekend

Hellew all!!! Time for another update =). Well plenty had happened over the looonnnggg weekend. Mine actually started on Friday night. Friday night, the bank’s recreational club had a movie night at the Empire cinema, it was for Harry Potter. I actually was not a member of the recreational club but everyone (when I mean everyone, it’s the young ppl in my office) asked me to join even though I’m like leaving soon. So I joined the club, got a voucher and we were all looking for extra vouchers that we could get from the senior staff so we don’t have to pay the non member price which is $8.50 compared to $3 for members. So yeah, at the end we managed to get 10 vouchers and I was put in charge of redeeming them. That Friday I took half the day off because I had a written test at HSBC! I was very thrilled. There was 3 test; an English test, a Math test and a personality test. The Math test was not what I thought it would be, it was one of those questions where you use the graphs and tables to find the answer. So it was not too bad, we were just given a time limit to do the test and I think most of us did not finish it. I just hope I get the job there… I so need a new job! Ok back to the night at the Empire, our movie was supposed to start at 7.20 and I was there at about 6.30++ and I managed to get seats where we wanted. So I waited in the lobby with other bank staffs. So we all watched the movie and after, only Rosie, Azre and I hanged out at the parking lot… it was fun =)

On Saturday, well I was home the whole morning, and in the afternoon when we went to pick up my mum, we sent one of our sisters off to swimming and then we went shopping. I wanted to experiment on a new recipe… actually more like Amie’s mum recipe, her Macaroni and Cheese… Did you know that finding Kraft’s Miracle whip is hard?!? So yeah we went shopping for a bit then we went home… not too interesting eh? So I made my macaroni and cheese… it think it was good, it went well I think. The only problem was that the cheese which I diced into small cubes was a bit too big but it was yummy.

Then on Sunday, my sis and I went for a KB road trip… well it started pretty late due to unforeseen reasons. So I’ll post up pictures for that bcoz pictures speak more words… heheheh =). And also other pics that I should have posted up! Enjoy.

me, rosie and raie at Empire for Harry Potter

at amie's housewarming some time ago
me and raie at Empire, waiting for the rest to arrive
some monument in kb
tea pot monument in kb
on our way back, the skies
me and my sis somewhere on the highway
my sis in kb walking to mum's
tea pot monument again
me on the buggy ride some sunday ago
my sis driving
the perayaan stalls in kb

me and my sis on our way to kb
me eating chicken kueh teow and ABC in kb... total $2.30
me in TPH sometime ago
my sis with the same food in kb

Saturday, July 7, 2007


Hellew~~ Well plenty had happened. First of all, I went to Amie’s housewarming on the 9th and met Lionel, Amie’s Darling for the first time… heheheh. Amie, if you’re reading this, here is what I think of him : I found him very “straight”, what I mean by that is that he sees the world in his own way, but I’m sure he might be different with Amie. I also found him a bit corny and funny when he asked Siang to do the sportsman thing… Overall, I can see that he is a very sweet, nice, polite and well mannered person… Oh Amie… It is very obvious that he is SO in LOVE with u… I think you’ve got something real good going on ;)

Moving on to that same week, my dad went for chemotherapy, I thought chemo was usually laser based, instead the one that my dad had was drips, pretty interesting… well if u are wondering how’s my dad, he back to his normal self =).

Now let’s move on to work, well I’ve been going back to work since the 8th and it’s not too bad; I actually miss working… ~~sigh~~ them good ol’ working days. At work, I’ve gotten closer to some people like Rosie and I also have fun hanging out in the office when it’s almost time to leave. Actually, the person in charge of me doing my tasks, Rosie told me that if I did not come on the 8th itself, they would replace me!! Could you believe it?!? Replace KeL?!? ~HMPH!!!~~ The nerve of them, I have already decided to really quit my job. It’s not because of the replacement thingy, if that is what you think it is because they can never replace KeL, not that I’m blowing my own trumpet or anything but they just can’t and you will know why soon. 14th of June was the day I handed in my resignation, and when the manager of my department read my letter she just smiled… now what is that supposed to mean?!? Then on Friday, when I went to my officer’s desk to fill in my part timer sheet ( psst..my officer sits beside the big boss) she saw me and we had a brief conversation, it went like this :


ME : Hi Boss ß I changed the name to.. Err… well you know why

BIG BOSS : (smiling) I got your letter and I already read it

ME : (nervously) ah… ok

BIG BOSS : But I don’t want to talk about it now

ME : (feeling relieved) oh ok

~ Then as I was about I to walk away

BIG BOSS : When do you start your second year?

ME : (in my head “oh crap!!!”) Err.. next year pulang, but after this I’ll be on

attachment for six months and I will not be coming to work.

BIG BOSS : So where will you be?

ME : Ummm… I’m not too sure because it’s up to the school to put us where

They wish and most of the choices that are given are mostly government


BIG BOSS : oh I see, I’m letting you go because I don’t want to kacau you study.

ME : (smiling) oh I see..

~ There was a pause and when I decided to walk away

BIG BOSS : Tapi kan, if you rasa boring kat rumah nanti, you can come back here

and work ok.

ME : (in my head “I knew it!!!) Oh okie then.. Thank you

BIG BOSS : Okie, thank you KeL.

ME : smiles and then I walked away

So now you see why they can’t replace me, its not that I’m not grateful for the job that I have but I don’t feel as if though they know what I go through. I like the part where I work alone in a safe and at times people come to ask me for documents, its just that they think that the volume that we are given are small, but its not, it’s a lot and it never ends. In the whole month of December last year, I worked my ass off to file all the overdue documents and when I left them to go back to the institution, everything went hancur!!! There were so many overdue documents!!! So yeah, the guy I work with, Azre… well, he’s a bit worried if I leave, there will be more pressure on him to complete filling. And if you are wondering when is my the last day at work… it will be on the 20th July, I think now I can let go. The last time I quit, it was the day before orientation at the institution began, and I guess it was a sudden change for me as I really enjoyed working at that time and I applied at the institution just to try my luck, and I got in. So I guess I was not ready to let go then, but now I am =)

Well, my results came out on the 21st and guess what?!? I FAILED!!!! Hahahah~~~ what luck eh?!? I decided not to continue on because I have no passion for studying… I bet some of you reading out there would say “Sayang jua, ia ani”. My decision for doing so is that if I am going to spend another year and what happen if I don’t make it through? So I think that this is the best path for me. I have my working experience and I can always take it elsewhere. 2 people had said that they want to cubit me because of my decision.

So on the 22nd I went to my boss to tell her I had failed and that I want to continue working with them. I plucked up all my courage and braveness just to do this. I’ll just pick up the key points in the whole conversation because she went round in circles.

ME : Hi Boss, I need to tell you something….

BIG BOSS : Hi KeL, Yes what is it?

ME : Ummm... I don’t think I’ll be continuing my 2nd year at the institution.

BIG BOSS : OH?? Why not?

ME : I failed my first year…

~ Big Boss then yaps away about some stuff and then…

BIG BOSS : What do you plan to do?

ME : Errr… I dunno… get a job maybe, I don’t have the passion for studying

BIG BOSS : Eeeeee… sayang u ani

BIG BOSS : Well at the moment I don’t have anything for you, maybe I can arrange

Where you can be half day in this department and the other half to

another department.

ME : (felling hopeless) oh I see..

~ I was feeling very devastated.

BIG BOSS : You think it over and you tell me what you want to do next; whether you

will continue on with us or go back to school..

So after that I went out lunch with the boys and I was really hopeless… it was like I had a really bad day!!! When I went to babu, I did not know what to eat… in the end I only had 2 roti kuning and cold water!!! That was how devastated I was… makan pun inda dapat!! If you know me, this is not normal. I told my sister that I’m not theirs to keep and her friend who used to work in the bank offered to talk to her, but I said no… tawar udah hati ku. My other sis then picked me up, I told her everything and we jalan-jalan for a bit and then she asked me “What’s wrong with you? Macam nada mood ja”. I then looked at her and said “How would you feel when you have already failed your first year and your boss then says she does not want you around?” she just kept quiet. Over the next few days I kept thinking what I should do and I decided to resign, who knows I might get a better job in another bank because of the experience I have.

The 28th was the day I dropped the bomb on my big boss… I will leave the bank for good. The thing was I was procrastinating the whole week from telling her, I then decided to just tell her. On that day, my big boss was not having a good day because… err… I don’t know why and I don’t care, janji ia kusut berabis. So I went up to her desk and this was how things went. I picked the most important and vital parts =D

ME : Hi Boss, I think I will still be resigning.

BIG BOSS : *looks up at me, sighs and signals me to sit down*

BIG BOSS : So what are you going to do?

ME : Ummm… take time off, figure things out and stuff.

BIG BOSS : You don’t have to actually terminate your contract you know.

ME : I know but I want to.

BIG BOSS : Maybe you can still continue just that you can come a couple hours for

that day and maybe once or twice in a week.

ME : Oh ok…

~ she then yaps away about how I have to reapply back if I still want to work there when I terminate my contract and stuff… she goes on about if I could help her find someone new and then before the conversation ends…

BIG BOSS : You really resigning kah?

ME : (with confidence) YES!!

BIG BOSS : (sighs) Ok I can’t stop you. Good luck in all you do.

ME : (smiling) Thank you

Now, how it feels like being rejected. I practically dangled myself in front of her with a big sign saying “TAKE ME!!!” and what did she do?!? Reject me!!... nah apa tah rasanya! COW!!!! And as for helping her find a replacement, I’m not going to do it… or else what is the bank’s HR for, right?!? And what happens if the person I recommend does not live up to how I work?!? They have to find someone new soon, before I leave. The other officers did beg me to stay but I will not. It goes to show that my big boss does not really know or care about her workers. I may be a part-timer and I have feelings, begging will not do. NOTHING will do. I would not go back because in my big boss eyes, I now know where I stand… and that is I’m just a really small, tiny fish which the big boss is most likely to ignore and chuck away! Yeah, I know I sound bitter, but try being in my shoes, I’m sure you would feel the same, no?

Well, talking about work and all, on the 30th, we had a buffet lunch at Rizqun for our half yearly thingy… I had loads of fun =) loads of laughing and teasing, it was fun. I don’t have pics yet coz it’s with one of my colleague who is now on leave. Will post it up when I get it ok =). And oh.. I watched transformers twice and I have never seen so much action in one movie ~whew~ errr… what else ah? I saw the bank guy I used to like yesterday when I gave him the reports =)… it’s been a while since I’ve seen him and he was quite surprised to see me =)… he still looks cute to me =) heheheh… I’m like all smiles now =) heheheh… if he reads this, I think he would know that I’m referring to him =) and oh, bank guy if you’re reading this… HI!!!! *waves* ^_^. I think that is it for today… bubyez… Muahz <33